Why I Was Gone

Why was I gone? The short answer: my hair.

I’ve been watching numerous video tutorials on how to properly care for my natural hair.

You might be thinking, “It’s just hair. Does it really require all that time, effort and research?”

Yes it does. As a Black woman, hair porosity, hair density and strand size play key roles in what types of products my hair needs in terms of moisture and hydration.

Shouldn’t you know this already?

Yes and no. I have a complicated relationship with my hair that has gradually improved over the past year. During my 27 years of living, my hair has been cared for by my mother and a professional hairstylist. I’ve historically been too low maintenance with my hair out of impatience and laziness.

My mother has told me for years, “You need to grease your scalp every other day. Or else it will become dry and brittle.”

Now COVID has forced me to prioritize my hair health. Last Saturday, I spent 3-4 hours detangling my hair with Cantu’s coil calm detangler to reduce knotting when washing my hair. Then I spent 12 hours diligently detangling and sectioning my hair into 20-30 twists while applying shampoo, a deep treatment hair masque and applying a leave-in conditioning cream once finished.

It had been three months since my last wash day. Yes, I said it. Three months. Again I’m impatient.

There was something therapeutic about thoroughly cleansing my scalp and adding the moisture my dry hair needed. I spent 1.5-2 hours applying Cantu’s leave in conditioning cream to my hair to maintain moisture and prevent dryness since my HVAC system disperses dry heat. Ultimately, it was a self-care routine.

Day 1

Although my hair has grown, there are several split ends I’ll be cutting off soon. But I love the shrinkage!

When I took my twists out the next day, I liked the results. My hair was softer and contained less knots.

Day 2

Overall I am very proud of myself for my patience during this process.

How do you practice self-care? Let me know in the comments below.


Am I A Sugar Addict?

My diet has changed drastically over the past few weeks. All of the artificially sweetened snacks I consumed excessively have been cut out of my life. Last month, I got a bad toothache after ordering Insomnia cookies three times in one week.

Yeah I know what you’re thinking. I have a problem. Maybe I do.

I love sweets. I love the way freshly baked sugar cookies and snickerdoodles melt in my mouth. I remember the first time I tried an Insomnia cookie. My friends and I had visited a friend at UGA during our spring break. Six years later, I almost crashed into a curb when my sister noticed Insomnia opened a new location two blocks away from me.

I know eating too many sweets can lead to tooth sensitivity and enamel erosion. However, I’ve struggled with eating them in moderation due to emotional eating and coping with loneliness during the pandemic.

Okay. So why the change?

I realized I didn’t want to experience gum disease, tooth loss or have to get my leg amputated like Big Mama in Soul Food when she battled diabetes. I knew I had the ability to refrain from artificial sugar consumption. As a result, I quit cold turkey and researched alternatives.

Photo Source: Daily Sabah

I bought plain Greek yogurt that my taste buds aren’t accustomed to. I bought carrots and pumpkin seeds to snack on throughout the day. I also purchased rutabaga aka yellow turnips, one of my favorite Thanksgiving dishes.

Photo Source: Trader Joe’s

But I’ve been craving sweets lately. I miss the rich, buttery taste of Trader Joe’s brookies which have a perfectly even amount of chocolate chip cookie and brownie. I miss biting into a freshly baked sugar cookie. I thought about buying Grandma’s Peanut Butter Cookies from the Chevron two miles away and the questionable Keebler M&M cookie packs located in my complex’s leasing office.

If I give in to temptation, I’ll feel more guilt than satisfaction. So now I’m researching which nearby stores sell garlic knots. I keep envisioning thick, juicy garlic knots drenched in olive oil and sprinkled with grated parmesan cheese. If I buy them, it won’t be a guilt-ridden pleasure.

Honestly, I’m waiting for berries and cantaloupe to get in season to pair them with plain yogurt.

What foods do you eat to curb your sugar cravings? What are your go-to healthy snacks?

Let me know in the comments below.


How to Stay Productive During COVID

We’re all processing the coronavirus. Everyday, news stations are reporting on both the rising number of COVID-19 cases and the death toll. We’ve all had plans delayed amid the pandemic. However, we can still be productive.

Think about hobbies or passions you want to spend more time on. Think about the things you’ve been pushing back for days, weeks or months. In a world where it seems like there’s not enough time to accomplish everything we want, it now feels like we have nothing but time.

Here are some ways I am using my time and some ways you can use yours.

Health in Her Hue by Jovonni R. Spinner

Create a Vision Board

As a creative dreamer, I always fantasize about different stories I want to tell via blogs, films and television series. Since I wrote down my desires, I found pictures that mirrored my short-term and long-term goals including travel, screenwriting and my cultural influences.

If you are still figuring out what you want for yourself, write down what comes to mind. Find pictures in magazines or search Google Images. You can purchase a poster board at your local Walmart or Target store. You can also purchase it for $1 at Dollar Tree. If you have an empty box laying around, cut a piece off and use it.

Continue reading “How to Stay Productive During COVID”


What’s Your Sign?

Welcome back beautiful people!

Knowing everyone is focused on self-care, New Year resolutions and manifestation, I’m not going to talk about that today.

A lot of people incorporate horoscopes into their everyday lives.

When I meet new people, one of the first things they ask is, “What’s your sign?” 

It’s a fun question because who doesn’t like being asked about themselves?

Continue reading “What’s Your Sign?”


Greenleaf: Questions That Need Answers

Now that season four of Greenleaf has premiered, there are many questions that need answers by the season finale.

Lady Mae

Will the Greenleaf matriarch reveal both Grace’s paternity and her previous affair to Jacob and Charity? Will Mae reveal the sexual abuse she experienced from her father to her children? During season one, the family experienced loss after Faith, her deceased daughter committed suicide. It was confirmed Faith was sexually assaulted by Mac, Mae’s pedophile-rapist brother. If Mae were to reveal her innermost secrets, it could destroy the glass fortress (which she created) the family has lived in for decades.

Kerissa Greenleaf

Will Kerissa file for divorce from Jacob, file for joint custody of Winkie, and buy a nice home for herself? Since season one, Kerissa has invested 150% into Jacob to fulfill her ambitions of power, prestige and wealth. Unfortunately, she has reaped no return on investment during their 20-year marriage. Kerissa is a confident, educated and ambitious woman. Everything she has desired since marrying Jacob she can achieve on her own. Unless she thinks otherwise. Does Kerissa think she can only achieve her dreams through Jacob? If so, why?

Jacob Greenleaf

Will Jacob be more self-aware? Will he realize his repetitive poor decisions result in his family’s demise? He has an opportunity to be an associate pastor at Harmony and Hope Ministries and to become a life coach to troubled youth. Will being a mentor prove to be a promising career? Or will Jacob fall victim to his own naivete, ignorance, impulses and infidelity yet again? 

Bishop James Greenleaf

After learning Grace is not his biological daughter, being conned by a seductress who is the daughter of the man he accidentally murdered, getting divorced, losing his church and facing death, it seemed Bishop had clarity. He was at peace. However, a law enforcement officer questions James about the burning of his old church building again. What else is Bishop hiding?

Charity Greenleaf

Since season three, Charity has asked, “When am I going to get my fairytale ending?.”

Charity, what do you want? Since season one, Charity has been the spoiled, youngest child who gets the least attention. But what is your fairytale ending? Besides wanting attention and people to listen to you, what is your end goal? Where do you see yourself in 5-10 years? How are you working towards that?

Zora Greenleaf

I love Zora. Zora is funny, clever, creative and stylish. I am relieved she left her abusive ex-boyfriend, returned home, and plans to attend college after high school graduation. Will she stay on track? Or will she fall for another bad boy…….or girl?

Sophia Greenleaf

Sophia dealt with a big blow last season. After discovering a benign condition that left her sterile, Sophia went from a budding Christ believer/Sunday school teacher to an angry teenager questioning her faith. Will Sophia go down a dark path similar to Zora? Or will she go down a dark path like her deceased Aunt Faith?

Grace Greenleaf

Grace. Grace has been the person holding the family together. Will she question her identity knowing Bishop is not her biological father? Will her and her half-brother Aaron continue to build a relationship?

During the season premiere, it is revealed Grace has an adult son in prison unbeknownst to Noah, Sophia and her family.  How will Grace navigate the repercussions of her actions?

We will see this season.

I’ve been ready since February. Are you?



Let Me Reintroduce Myself

So………………I have been MIA for 18 days for a few reasons. It’s difficult to post consistently when you are trying to figure things out. I am looking for full-time employment (which has been a 6-month process) and preparing to start a real estate associate program in two weeks. In addition, I came back from Afropunk NYC a few days ago and needed to adjust to my normal schedule.

Since starting my blog in June, my sole focus has been television. After much reflection, I have decided to discuss whatever I want – film, television, and my personal life.

I am a woman of many passions. I love how TV and film mimic real-life family dynamics, exposes me to different ways of life, invites me into the story and prompts self-reflection. I also love how both storytelling forms celebrate fashion from different time periods.

I am excited to discuss different topics such as embracing change and uncertainty, the long-term commitment to creating a work-life balance, overcoming fear, navigating career transitions and the childhood memories that shape us.

Though I have written episodic recaps, I will not discuss every moment in an episode. There are numerous bloggers and vloggers that do so already. I prefer to directly link characters’ evolution and characters’ stagnation to their present storyline in current seasons.

Moving forward, I will post twice a week. My endgame is to post four times a week. I commend writers who posts daily like Tamara Tattles. My long-term goal is to build a community of transparency, creativity, and vulnerability.

So enjoy the ride!

What keeps you consistent in your writing?

Enjoy the Small Things

Last weekend, I had my Saturday planned out. I would drop off a few things at my family’s house and then go to the mall for the first time in 9 months. Although the CDC loosened COVID restrictions, I’m still practicing social distancing and allowed myself to go outside more as the weather changes. During this time in Georgia, we get the perfect combination of warm weather, sunshine, clear blue skies and cool breeze. This period is short-lived before 90% humidity becomes a mainstay for the next 3-4 months so I wanted to enjoy it while its here.

My plan was to walk around the mall, buy a buttery Auntie Anne’s soft pretzel and then decide what eateries to grab dinner from in the local area.

But my plan slightly changed after leaving my family’s house. What was supposed to be an easy drop-off turned into an hourlong conversation that left me feeling pissed and annoyed.

Typically I would sulk, complain, and brainstorm dozens of ways to fix a problem I’m not responsible for resulting in emotional and mental exhaustion.

Instead of doing that, I drove to the mall and discussed my frustrations with my sister for 10-15 minutes. It was 4:30 pm on a beautiful Saturday afternoon and I was determined to enjoy myself. After our talk, we entered the mall and patronized a new Vietnamese restaurant. It was my first time trying Vietnamese style chicken egg rolls and they were delicious!

We walked around the mall and spent more time in Spencer’s than I anticipated. Their merchandise was a mixture of childhood nostalgia, Hot Topic tees, drinking games and sex toys. Oddly enough, I was curious how to use some of their sex toys because I was confused how it worked. The experience was like Hot Topic minus the emo and gothic component but with more lighting. So I accomplished my goal. I enjoyed my Saturday.

Then we went back to the mall Sunday and got my Auntie Anne’s pretzel. We didn’t want to go home yet but didn’t know where else to go. I was curious about a new biker-friendly park nearby so we went there. I enjoyed resting my head on my purse, laying in the grass, savoring the 80 degree weather, admiring the clear blue skies and not wearing my mask because the few people there were on separate ends of the lawn.

It was such a beautiful day. There’s nothing like that hour before sunset. We simply tried it and know that’s another place we can hang out.

Regardless of your goals and adversities, you still have the right to cherish the small moments.

Allow yourself to explore new things even if it’s a new restaurant nearby or a tea shop you pass regularly.

It’s better to try something new than to not try at all. Otherwise how will you grow?

What’s something new you’re doing this weekend?

7 Positive Affirmations You Can Tell Yourself Daily

Positive affirmations are great for combatting negative self talk and can be an excellent form of self-compassion.

But what if you don’t believe an affirmation you randomly found online after saying it the first time?

What if you need more?

Not to worry. Here are seven positive affirmations you can tailor to your life.

  1. I am more than worthy and deserving of self love, self respect, self compassion, self care, and the respect of others.
  2. I am building a life of self sufficiency, self validation, and self fulfillment.
  3. I am a { blank }. I am a successful { blank }.
  4. I have 100% of the power to make myself happy.
  5. I am worthy of decency, honesty, and respect.
  6. I am worthy as I am.
  7. I am enough as I am.

What is your go-to positive affirmation?

7 Triggering AF Inspirational Quotes

We all need inspiration. Some of us follow social media accounts that post daily inspirational messaging for encouragement as a way to start our day or to improve our mood during tough times. But some of the messaging can be loaded statements that make growth and personal development sound effortless.

Here are seven inspirational quotes that are triggering AF.

  1. Love yourself. – Learning to love yourself is a lifelong process. If you’ve been living a life of self-sabotage rooted in self hatred or living a life based on society’s harmful messaging about worthiness and desirability, that’s a lot of shit to unpack. That’s a lot of triggers and negative coping mechanisms to identify, to understand why you engage in those coping mechanisms, how often you engage in them, identify the feeling/emotion and/or trauma that coping mechanism temporarily suppresses, and then create a healthy behavior to navigate the issue productively.
  2. Be kind to yourself. – Learning and practicing self compassion is a daily process. You have to think about what you say to yourself that’s unkind. How are you mean or cruel to yourself? Do you punish yourself? If so, how? How can you set boundaries with yourself? What positive affirmation can you tell yourself to replace negative self talk during specific situations?
  3. Practice self-care. – Sometimes, social media glamorizes self care as this fun, holistic spiritually enlightening practice. But you want to figure out what it looks like for you. It could be engaging in a hobby, journaling, yoga, meditation, etc. In addition, you have to figure out how to incorporate those practices into your daily routine.
  4. Just be yourself. – You have to decide whether you will show up as your authentic self and be prepared to defend yourself against naysayers or to operate in a way that doesn’t ruffle the feathers of others while suffering mentally and emotionally from minimizing yourself. It sounds simple but it’s quite a radical act. Will you operate from a place of misery or will you be courageous enough to come as you are? Either choice determines the trajectory of your life.
  5. Don’t care about what other people think. – But we do care. We care about how we’re perceived because it affects how we’re treated. We care about our work performance. We care about how well a major client receives our presentation that could result in a job promotion and a raise. Creatives care about how people perceive their work. You care about what suit you wear to the job interview because you want to exude executive presence. Living your life without caring about what others think is impossible. But living your life without allowing others’ opinions to dictate your happiness is doable. It’s a matter of finding a happy medium as my mother says.
  6. Life is too short to hold grudges so forgive and move on. – Sometimes, grudges and resentment are warranted depending on the person and the nature of your relationship with them. Yes, we’re responsible for making the best of the time we have. But that’s not a reason to quickly forgive without thoroughly understanding why you were hurt, how you were hurt, who you were hurt by, what you learned from the situation and how you can protect yourself moving forward. You have to forgive yourself and forgive for yourself when you’re ready.
  7. Let love find you, don’t chase it. – As a former pick-me, this triggered the fuck out of me. Growing up as a Disney princess fan who also watched American rom-coms starring Katherine Heigl religiously, I convinced myself I had to manufacture a fairytale romance. I was wrong. You don’t want to hear “be patient” when you’re fixated on hitting specific milestones by a certain age – especially as a woman. When you see your friends and other people around you booed up, you might feel left out. Then add internalized misogyny and ageism. You’re getting older, Prince Charming hasn’t arrived and the panic button in you says, “The clock is ticking you gotta make this happen or else you’ll be alone forever.” But the quote is true. Chasing romance is like chasing validation and the feeling of adequacy. If you’re chasing that, then you’re not ready for romantic love.

I don’t think the intention is to make life sound easy, but to prompt a person to take the first step toward improving a specific aspect of their life. If inspirational messages weren’t written simplistically, some may not read them if it were as long as this post.

What is your favorite inspirational quote? What does it mean to you?

Overcoming My Sexual Harassment Experience Part 1

I was sexually harassed for the first time at age 14. I got out of school early due to finals week and decided to take advantage of the 1-2 hours I had without adult supervision. I changed out of my shirt into a pink spaghetti strap top that stopped 2-3 inches above my waistline. It was a warm, summer day and I wanted to feel sexy. I was on that Manny Santos, “I wanna be hot” shit.

Cassie Steele as Manny Santos on Degrassi: The Next Generation

An hour later, I met up with family friends to pick up my sister from the bus stop. They asked me to get a few snacks from the gas station that was on a slight hill. As I walked up the hill, an older man catcalled me. I don’t remember exactly what he said but it was sexual. I felt like I’d done something bad.

The gas station cashier asked me if I was scared, and I replied no. I was lying. I was afraid the man outside might catcall me again, follow me or try to touch me. The man looked to be in his mid-40s to mid-50s – honestly, he looked older than my father.

When my mom came home from work, I told her what happened.

“Did you change your clothes?” she asked.

I said no. I didn’t want to get in trouble for disobeying her rules.

But I felt like I was in trouble.

Since I was a preteen, my mother told me, “You can look nice and show your figure without showing too much. It leaves a little imagination. Showing too much attracts the wrong attention.”

I thought the incident confirmed her theory.

Provocative clothing like low-cut tops and low-rise jeans worn together, tight jeans and short dresses were banned from my household. My parents said it created the perception that I’m a hoochie.

My mother always told me dressing classy had its perks. My father echoed these sentiments. “That’s one of the things that attracted me to your mother.”

But I didn’t want to hear that. None of my crushes had noticed me in an entire year and I wanted to change that immediately.

As a 14-year-old girl, there were several girls I idolized both real and fictional:

Blake Lively as Serena van der Woodsen on Gossip Girl
  • Serena van der Woodsen was the “It” girl at Constance Billard School for Girls and St Jude’s School for Boys. She was the beautiful, stylish, carefree social butterfly you wanted to be or date.
Leighton Meester as Blair Waldorf on Gossip Girl
  • Queen B was the most popular and powerful mean girl at Constance and ruled with an iron fist. Her multi-layered personality and ruthlessness won the heart of billionaire heir/bad boy Chuck Bass unintentionally.

Dilshad Vadsaria as Rebecca Logan on Greek
  • Rebecca Logan was untouchable. She was the most sought-after pledge among the sororities at Cyprus Rhodes University because her father was a wealthy politician. She got away with sleeping with her “Big sis soror’s” boyfriend and took her spacious bedroom suite within her first semester. Rebecca knew she was a beautiful, privileged bitch and owned it. In my book, she was WINNING.
  • In 2007, Rihanna transitioned from the beautiful island girl to the edgy, sultry Good Girl Gone Bad. Everyone wanted her asymmetrical haircut including me. During 2007-2008, she released consecutive hits such as – Umbrella, Shut Up and Drive, I Hate How Much I Love You, Take a Bow, and Don’t Stop the Music. By 2008, she became pop music’s “It” girl and was #15 on Maxim’s Hot 100.

I wanted the attention, desirability and the power these women had. I wanted to be picked.

My small attempt to obtain that came at a cost.

For the longest, I felt responsible for my experience with sexual harassment. I felt guilty and ashamed for putting myself in a dangerous situation.

Had I not changed my top the man wouldn’t have catcalled me. I invited his attention and consequently he treated me like a sexually provocative woman, I thought.

Now 27, I view the situation differently. It wasn’t my fault. Although I disobeyed my parents, I wasn’t asking for his attention or his sexual remarks. He knew I was underage. He had no right to harass me. He shouldn’t have perceived me in a sexual manner.

He shouldn’t have felt emboldened to say anything. I was not responsible for his actions. I didn’t make him do anything.

If you have experienced sexual harassment or any other form of sexual violence, it is not your fault. What you wear is not asking for the wrong attention. No one has the right to disrespect you or dehumanize you. No one is entitled to your body or your time.

If you want to talk to someone about your experience with sexual harassment or sexual violence, here’s a resource.

13 Things I’m Doing Post COVID

As more Americans get coronavirus vaccinations, it seems like there’s light at the end of a long dark tunnel. I am hopeful and a bit excited because it looks like we’re inching closer to normalcy. Ultimately, the news inspired me to think about my plans after the pandemic.

Here are 13 Things I’m Doing Post COVID:

  1. Get my hair trimmed or cut. I haven’t had a trim in 15 months. Although my hair has grown, there are a few uneven parts. I want my natural hair to grow back evenly which will likely require a cut.
Photo Source by The Black Hair Tribe
  1. Pay a stylist to install two strand twists. As someone with a low maintenance hair routine, I want a protective hairstyle that lasts 1.5-3 months. But I want my twists done differently by creating a side part. This will create a side sweeping effect that adds versatility and lets me play with it.
Business owner assisting customer in nail salon. Photo Source: Getty Images. Creator: Peathegee Inc.
  1. Get my nails done. I want a fresh manicure and a pedicure. I want to try a nail salon that offers quality nailcare products that won’t damage my cuticles and high quality press-on nails that last three weeks.
Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com
  1. Meet up with my friends. Whenever my friends and I hang out, we have a good time. I’m looking forward to catching up over a delicious meal in Atlanta.
  1. Attend a Black burlesque show. Last year, I attended a talent showcase at Apache Café where three female performers did a burlesque number. I loved their confidence, the way they expressed their sensuality and sexuality. Now I want to attend an actual burlesque show and learn how to tap into my sensuality and sexuality.
  1. Attend a film festival. I love watching independent films and think it will be fun to meet new people during viewings. Also I like listening to panel discussions with the writers, directors and cast explaining the process of making the project.
Photo by nappy on Pexels.com
  1. Attend a local fashion show. I have a newfound appreciation for fashion after binge watching Alaia, Chanel and Gianni Versace shows for three months. I would like to support an up-and-coming designer and identify what story their collection tells.
  1. Attend a social event at my coworking space. I look forward to vibing out to DJ Thrice Groove’s mix again and meeting other members. Plus it’s an excuse to dress up.
  1. Try out a semi-expensive sushi restaurant in Atlanta. I tend to patronize the same restaurants because I enjoy the food. However, I want to change my scenery and venture into Buckhead, Midtown Atlanta or Downtown Atlanta. My friend loves sushi-grade fish so I know she’ll come along.
  1. Go to a concert at Vinyl. I love small, intimate concert spaces because it feels like a private party. I don’t have to worry about people accidentally spilling drinks on me or security moving through the crowd because someone passed out from dehydration.
Photo Source: The Connector
  1. Attend the Atlanta Jazz Festival and the Sweet Auburn Festival. Attending local festivals are a summer tradition for me. I enjoy the warm weather, admiring the way a handsome man’s brown skin glistens under the sun, and the sound of Frankie Beverly, Chaka Khan and Luther Vandross blaring through loudspeakers. It’s nothing but good, familial backyard BBQ vibes I cherish.
  1. Go to Tokyo Valentino. I’ve passed the store a couple of times. It looks intriguing from the exterior and I’m curious to know what the interior looks like.
  1. Go to G Garvey’s new restaurant. I love soul food and grew up watching his cooking show. Recently I saw a video of him making lobster and crab mac and cheese and I want it! Something tells me I’ll be required to make reservations and pay for parking but it’s worth it.

What are you planning for post-vaccination or post-pandemic?

Let me know in the comments below.

Coping With Loneliness During COVID

I have felt a deep sense of loneliness over the past year. I haven’t hung out with my friends in over 14 months and February 2020 was the last time I attended an event. I applied strategies to keep myself occupied during the pandemic. However, the monthly virtual meetups, 1-2 day interactions on Bumble, and biweekly informational interviews aren’t enough to fill the void of in-person social engagement.

Am I meant to be alone?

Don’t get me wrong, I know how to enjoy my own company. I can jam out to my Soundcloud and YouTube playlists anytime. Hell, I laugh at my own jokes and talk shit while watching TV shows and films alone. But I miss meeting new people and having interesting conversations over appetizers.

Are you struggling with loneliness or pandemic fatigue? Here are eight ways to cope:

Stock Photo by Cathy Yeulet

Start a project. It is spring cleaning time. If you have a room to declutter or redecorate, do it! Start with one section of a room or one box.

Photo by Zen Chung on Pexels.com

Write. Journal your thoughts. Dumping your thoughts on paper might ease your mind after carrying a lengthy diary entry in your head.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Start a blog. There are communities you can connect with through shared experiences and interests. Creating a blog to discuss those topics allows you to engage with others.

Photo by Zen Chung on Pexels.com

Go outside. Getting fresh air can help clear your mind and organize your thoughts. Sometimes, you need a break from people, work assignments and other factors that cause stress.

Talk it out. Talk to your therapist, a close friend or a trusted family member. If therapy is inaccessible to you and you can’t confide in anyone, record your thoughts on your phone’s audio recording app.

Photo by Daria Shevtsova on Pexels.com

Make a recipe. Try a new recipe or recreate a memorable dish you had. Google “how to make {the dish you want].” Pinterest is also a great place to find recipes.

Watch a random film or series. Staying at home has given us more time to binge-watch. But watching a series outside your preferred genre might surprise you. Who knew my grown ass would like Ginny and Georgia?

Plan your future social life. Think about your hobbies and passions. Think about what types of people you want to meet. Then research online groups and meetups that align with your interests. Reach out to join virtually or add those groups to your post-pandemic plans.

Remind yourself you’re not destined to be alone. You will socialize in person again.

You are worthy and deserving of meaningful human connection.

How do you cope with loneliness?

Let me know in the comments below. I’d love to hear from you and chat.

How to Find Joy in Your Present During COVID

Monday marked the 1-year anniversary of COVID-19. When we first learned about the coronavirus, nobody could anticipate the detrimental effects it would have globally. But despite the chaos, we can find joy in our lives.

Today I am sharing tips about how to enjoy at least some elements of the present when you’re hitting a pandemic wall.

Photo by Meru Bi on Pexels.com

Appreciate the Extra Time

Being laid off amid the pandemic was one of the best things that ever happened to me. As I reflected on my career options, I realized I needed something more fulfilling than an excellent compensation plan. I needed a career that allowed me to build meaningful relationships, cultivate a sense of community where people feel welcomed by using empathy and creative writing skills and that offered a flexible schedule.

Whether you start a new business, start a project, rediscover a passion, or make a career transition, do it! Conduct research, contact people who can help you, make a plan and begin. One of the most precious things the past year has granted us is ample time to be intentional about what we do next.

Photo by Daniel Torobekov on Pexels.com

Take Risks

I could have spent $500+ on a semester-long course to earn a certification within an industry I’m barely interested in, secure a job in that field and then move.

But that’s not how it worked out.

Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on Pexels.com

In early September, I realized my old apartment had served its purpose and that it was time to move on. Three weeks later, I signed a 12-month lease and moved into a new apartment complex with no regrets.

Taking a leap is scary as fuck because there’s no control over what’s next, no systematic approach, and no comfort in familiarity. It’s based on complete faith in knowing things will work out.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

Cherish the Simple Things

Music plays a key role in your mental health and can improve your mood. Blasting Disclosure’s Nocturnal in my car or jamming to Marcos Valle’s Nao Tem Nada Nao while running errands on a beautiful sunny Friday afternoon makes the day more joyous, less monotonous and less lonesome.

Photo by Gabby K on Pexels.com

Maintain Your Friendships

Because I have been social distancing since March 2020, I’ve become accustomed to being alone. Consequently, I forget I have friends I can call. If you’re experiencing this, I recommend reaching out to a friend and propose weekly or monthly calls to stay connected.

For example, my old college friend and I hadn’t called each other since August but agreed to do monthly FaceTime calls instead of exclusively communicating via text conversations.

Ultimately, we have 100% of the power to cultivate joy into our lives.

What are you grateful for? How are you finding joy? Let me know in the comments below.

Major Changes: Adulting

Hey guys! Long time no see. I know. It’s been 3-4 months. I moved into a new apartment!

I am accustomed to calling my new residence home. I haven’t accidentally driven to my old apartment out of habit. The natural scented air freshener lingers throughout my dining room and living room reminding me the newly renovated apartment smell has not disappeared yet. It is my space to just be.


I’ve decorated nothing. The thought of establishing a design theme for an entire apartment induces my anxiety. I barely decorated my previous bedroom. However, I know I want a medium-sized picture centered on my bedroom wall. I want it to be a statement piece that embodies my purpose and a reminder of what I am proud of. But I don’t know what it will look like.


There is a newfound silence. When I lived in my previous apartment, the silence occurred when TVs were turned off and everyone was asleep.

Here, it is peaceful at times that require focus. But sometimes, it can feel lonely.

Home Improvement

I was intimidated by the hundreds of home improvements materials I walked past in Home Depot. I know nothing about home improvement tools. NOTHING.

There are four types of people. The people who use the tools to build and fix things, the people who pay them to do it, DIYers, and the people who hand snacks and beverages to the DIYers as they fix and build things. I am the latter.

Now I know a few things after five trips to Home Depot. I know what aisle to find portable alarms, the type of sandbags to use for flood prevention, to avoid sandbags with bugs inside of them and to lay plastic in my trunk before loading sandbags.

What did you learn from your first move? Any decoration suggestions?